


swing a little further (higher)

by orphan_account



Series: this is for the snakes and the people they bite [2]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Mental Health Issues, PWP, Trans Character, Trans John
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-24
Updated: 2016-06-24
Packaged: 2018-07-16 22:51:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,339
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7287847
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He wasn’t certain what caused this, he never was when his Laurens got in a mood. His ability to actively work towards the root of John’s situation never failed to exhaust him. Alexander wasn’t able to care like he was supposed to – something about having empathy issues, he figured, something about not understanding, not feeling complete emotions like he should have been.</p>
<p>That was okay.</p>
            </blockquote>





	swing a little further (higher)

**Author's Note:**

> this is boring and short and its mostly pwp lmao  
> once again i didnt have a beta and im too tired to proofread rn so point out any errors pls??  
> the ending is super rushed sorry ive been working on this for so long and i just wanted to get it Done

Alexander was not used to silence from John. John was big and loud, even when he didn’t mean to – when he was angry, he let the world know before running off to blow steam and his voice took up the room whether he was furious or happy or or or—

But that didn’t matter right now.

Right now, his John was quiet, subdued, curled up into himself just the _slightest_ bit, enough to tell Hamilton that something was wrong. He wasn’t certain what caused this, he never was when his Laurens got in a mood. His ability to actively work towards the root of John’s situation never failed to exhaust him. Alexander wasn’t able to care like he was supposed to – something about having empathy issues, he figured, something about not understanding, not feeling complete emotions like he should have been.

That was okay.

Frustrating to his friends and lovers, yes, but okay to him. So Alexander helped in what ways he could.

He started by joining his John on the couch, curling his body around the curve of his back, loosely wrapping his arms around his waist.

“Hey, babe,” John greeted but it lacked its usual inflection, coming across as tired, defeated. His eyes, normally so wide and sparkling, were dull, pulled down by sleep. His whole body, his entire self, seemed void of color. Alex rubbed circles into John’s hip. Maybe he could bring the color back himself.

John let out a small sigh, reaching back to tangle his fingers into Alexander’s hair, carding through the long black locks. It was an awkward position for his arms to be in, but he didn’t mind. John could wax poetic on Alex at any moment, from the way his feet laid just the slightest bit inward, the way his fingernails were chewed to the beds, to the way he unconsciously nuzzled into John’s cleavage while they were snuggling, the way he _mewled_ when John pulled his hair just so – and by God, did Alex mewl.

With all the tugging, it wasn’t long before Alex was rutting up against John, breathing hard against his neck. Alex’s hand had curled itself into John’s shirt, rucking it up, groaning flat-out as he ran it over John’s soft, warm skin, fingers peeking underneath his bra. John gave a pleased sigh in return.

When John drew back to climb on top of Alexander, the boy below him had a smile plastered on his face.

“Are you feeling better, babe?” Alexander asked, reaching up to caress John’s face. There was a rosy hue coloring his cheeks and he looked – content. By all means, he was in no way “fixed.” That was something Alexander couldn’t do. It wasn’t even something he _wanted_ to do. He loved his John, flaws and all.

John gave him a look that he could only describe as _lovestruck_. Eyes wide, mouth agape just a bit, looking at Alex like he hung the moon. Alex prickled under his intense gaze but then John was darting forward, lips sliding messily against his own as he kissed him open-mouthed.

“Yeah.” he breathed when he pulled back. “Better. Not good, but… a lot better.” His breath hitched and he fell right back in again, kissing Alex messily, using his thumb to open Alex’s mouth when he was left licking at the seam of his lips. The sound he let out was _guttural_ so John let his fingers replace his tongue.

It was obscene, watching Alex drag his own tongue along the rough skin of his knuckles, wet catching on dry. And _Jesus_ , he was looking up at John through his eyelashes so goddamn suggestively, _where had he even learned that._

“Fuck.” John groaned, then let out a surprised gasp of “ _shit_ ” when Alex pounced on him, knocking him on his back so that he was now straddling his hips. And then – Alex’s hands were all over him, big broad and warm ripping off his shirt and hiking up his bra, calloused palms shooting sparks wherever his touch lingered. They hesitated at John’s pants, Alex seemingly contemplating on what he should be doing.

But Alex wasn’t really one for contemplating, was he?

John’s sweats were shucked down just to his knees when Alex was on him, bruising kisses pressed into the softness of John’s thighs, pulling closer and closer to his core.

“Can I?” he asked when he was _just there_ , a grin playing on his lips, and John only whined, canting his hips forward in silent affirmation. And then Alex’s tongue was on him and John could have screamed.

Alex took care of him, as he always did. His broad tongue swiped over his clit for just a second, then went to his entrance, sighing at the taste. John curled his fingers into Alex’s hair to ground himself. When Alex moved back up to his clit, he couldn’t help the flat-out moan he let out, nor the sharp tug on Alexander’s hair. His boyfriend _keened_ , and the sound made John’s toes curl. He tugged more, skewing the aim of Alex’s tongue, but he was quick to reposition, laying his hands on the insides of John’s thighs to keep himself steady. With the way Alex hands had John’s legs spread, John had the most gorgeous view as he ate him out enthusiastically. He was red-faced, olive skin going slightly splotchy, pupils blown wide. “Pretty,” John sighed. “So pretty, _God_.”

Shaking loose the hand at the crown of Alexander’s head, John gripped his hair at the back, clenching his hand into a fist and yanking, something he knew Alex loved – cause this wasn’t just about him, Alex needed him too, and it was a mutual kind of destruction, this _dependency_ on each other.

Alex could kinda see how that hurt the both of them, but – but he just didn’t care, with John next to him, he was safe, never in doubt if he was loved or wanted or whatever. That’s what he needed – the security. John was rough, too, which wasn’t too bad, but he could be soft when Alex needed it, when he was so overwhelmed that he needed the hour or so of John just _being_ there, inviting and gentle and loving.

Alexander doubled his efforts.

He spread John’s legs a little more, palms flat on his thighs to keep him down and steady as he worked. The sounds John was making were becoming softer now, strangled whines that made him sound near tears. One of his hands came up to his mouth where he bit the meat of his palm hard, jerking his hips as the pain hit him.

“Alex, please. Shit, _please_.”

Before Alex knew it, John was grinding against Alex’s mouth as his orgasm rushed through him, but he was barely able to recuperate because Alex was still – Jesus, John could barely look down at him because Alex was _focused_ , completely focused like it was his job to make John come again.

“Oh _God_ ,” he keened. He could barely keep still, hips itching to just buck up into Alex’s mouth but he had him neatly pinned, so he could only whimper when the overstimulation got a little too painful.

But fuck, he trusted Alexander more than anyone. He trusted him unconditionally and maybe even a little recklessly, because he’s just way too in love with him to _not_ let his fears go. He just – wanted. He wanted and he took and Alex dealt with him and it was _good_.

“G— _od_ , Alex, I’m—”

John let out a little shriek as he came a second time, his whole body trembling as his breathing started going back to something slightly normal. Alex pulled away from him and he couldn’t help but drag him up by his collar for a kiss, slow and languid.

Alex tilted his head back to look into John’s eyes.

“Was that—”

“ _Yes_.”

John stole another kiss before tucking himself into Alex’s arms.

“Y’know I love you, right?” he asked, hiding his sated smile in Alexander’s neck.

“Yeah. Yeah, I do.”

**Author's Note:**

> feel free to send in fic reqs at http://waved.tumblr.com/


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